Pages

03 November 2008

Defensive, Argumentative and Judgemental

It is very hard to keep tranquility in our social life. Being so defensive makes people hate you because they will regard you as egoist. I cannot deny that I am a defensive type of person which sometimes makes people uneasy with me. Denying this fact will make my friends very mad at me. Usually, people like those who do not know how to argue more than especially when they always 'lose' in argument.

The question is why I am acting in such a manner? It is simply because I cannot bear people's thought that to keep silent when someone question you means that you are wrong. You do not have to tell me that that is not the perception of everyone in this world seems that I am only making a general statement.

Being an argumentative type of person also put me in trouble. I always have interest in listening to debates happened between my friends especially when it involve religious matters. But most of the debates will end up with me as the one of the debater even I am not when those debates start due to the interruptions that I made during the debate session. Thus, now I would like to refrain myself from talking while listening other people debating so I will not be facing any trouble.

I was also told by my friends not to judge others. The most annoying and irritating question I ever 'gifted' with was, "who are you to judge other people?". At that very time I just want to say, "My dear learned friend, it is not the matter of judging other person but are you fool enough until you unable to differentiate between right and wrong?" But luckily my 'frankness' has some limitation.

I do accept the fact that I am just a human being which always commit sins and mistakes. But please do not say to me "do not judge other" when 'the other' has done something which is obviously wrong.

I believe that readers especially my friends will take this post as an invitation to 'attack' me. But as The Rock (former wrestler, currently actor) used to say when he is still a wrestler, "it doesn't matter" and "just bring it" since tranquil environment is sometimes quite boring.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

emmm...i believe my friend wat did ur friends mean bout da word "judgmental" is u make ur conclusion/criticism based on their physical traits...ever heard bout da phrase "dont judge a book by its cover"?dis phrase means not 2 judge ppl by da looks of their appearances,but by knowing their inner side..if u're criticizing someone's behavior based on their wrong doings,i would call it as "nasihat" or "tegahan" rather than judgmental..coz it is a right thing 4 us 2 voice out our disapproval on something immoral..one of examples of being judgmental can be illustrated in ur blog dated 3rd oct 2008 which was entitled ceriteraku,when da author said ppl who write their blogs 2 tell bout their personal life dont deserve 2 live...i cant see any wrongdoings or vices can be done by writing ur personal stories on blog..dat is being judgmental my friend..

syfadh said...

yes my friend tq for ur comment. i do appreciate it.

have u ever read the Quranic verse which Allah says as follow (in malay):

"sesungguhnya berjayalah org-org yg beriman, yg khusyuk di dlm solat mereka, dan yg menjauhi perkara yg sia-sia..." (surah al-mu'minun)

if u read carefully my previous post "ceriteraku", u will notice that I'm talking about using blog to benefit other.

talking crap is a part of 'perkara yg sia-sia' then that is wrong about it if u refer to the above holy verse my friend. because a muslim should prevent himself from doing something 'sia-sia'.

my friend even before u made the 'tegahan or nasihat' u had actually gone through a judgemental process to analyse whether that behavior is right or wrong. then it's also involves judgement.

H e r said...

woah

AkMaL aRiF said...

aku terasa diriku ini amat la jahil lagi "syaitan"
wahai si pendeta karut marut!!
ahahahahah

Raafiq said...

aku dah agak.sure ade pnye anonymous.walopun ni blog ko syed,aku meminta kebenaran saudara untuk mengucapkan:

GO TO HELL ano!!

Mohd Eqwan Bin Mohd Roslan said...

Salam akh,

http://guidedthoughts.blogspot.com/2008/05/adab-berkhilaf.html

Try to restrain from disagreeing with other if you can or if you think it will bring more harm than good or if you think it doesn't really make any significance or if it's not a significant thing such as akidah.

Anonymous said...

to rafiq:

dont be too narrow minded...i believe my comment here doesnt have anything to do with any personal humiliation/attack..we were just having a healthy debate/argument by exchanging our different points of view....if u have some sort of personal issues with people whose using anonymous as their nickname,that's a misfortune to u..u should report to the blogsport administrator asking them to remove "anonymous" from list of optional identities rather than wasting ur time throwing bad words to me...another good examples of being judgmental can be seen from rafiq's comment..he trows dirty and harsh word towards me just because i use my identity as anonymous,regardless the content of my comment...if the owner of the blog didnt mind i commented his post,why should u??remember,it's better to choose ur words before saying it to the public..it shows our true nature..words are permanent u know..people take them for granted..